The Library Diaries: Oops I did it again!

Recently My Chemical Romance trotted off to work on a Monday morning, happy to be escaping the insane asylum/zoo, and about an hour after he left the flooding began.

Something flooded near the toilet, so much so that the water was dripping through to the ceiling of our kitchen (and, ironically, INTO THE SINK. Which was very thoughtful of the water, right?)

Luckily the toilet itself wasn’t flooding. Unluckily, at least that was a scenario I could have explained to My Chemical Romance; instead the conversation went like this

Me, trying to be calm: “Omg. Omfg. ZOMFG! There’s water! It’s like Noah’s Ark in our bathroom!”

My Chemical Romance, trying to suppress a yawn: “Okay. Where’s it coming from?”

Me: “I cannot and will not answer any question which ends in a preposition.”

My Chemical Romance: **crickets**

Me: “FINE. The bathroom. Somewhere in the vicinity of the toilet.”

My Chemical Romance: “Turn off the water. I’ll deal with it when I get home.”

Me: “But… I haven’t showered since Saturday. I haven’t washed my hair since Friday.”

My Chemical Romance: “Turn off the water.”

I told the kids I was turning off the water and immediately they all needed to wash their hands and pee 2352532 times in a row. I ended up turning it off and on several times. Also, although I promised MCR that I would turn it off immediately, I did take a quick shower, because I was gross.

So what does this have to do with the library, you’re asking? Well. In the bathroom was, of course, lots of reading material, including a library book. Which, by that time, had turned drenched and soggy.

(Someday I’ll blog about getting water damage on a book from the library in Arizona; it’s a good story.)

The librarians still give me stink eye because of that small issue with ROOM, earlier this year. Emma Donoghue, the author of ROOM, should really thank me for getting about twenty more people to read it thanks to my blog. Anyway, I am not looking forward to explaining this new issue to the librarians, and having to pay for the book. I ended up tossing it (along with some magazines) because it was just that wet and gross, but I’m sure it sounds like an excuse to them.

My bathroom flooded and the book was in it and now I owe you $40 even though it’s a trade paperback, right?

I will probably skip the detailed explanation altogether and just tell them that a book was accidentally destroyed and I need to pay for it. The upside is I’ll get to “keep” the book. However, this particular book kind of sucked and was the kind of the book I totally would return on time. I hate that. I would much rather “keep” a book that I actually enjoyed.


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